Bluured Vision

The Story Of A Lily Pt.1

by AJ
I can't remember the first night that I got the email... but I do remember I was having somewhat of a bad night on air... I was all loose minded... random thoughts and messed up computers. But the email came through... it was weird, because the internet had just started working... she couldn’t sleep; her subject line indicated it to me right away and caught my attention.

So much was going on, yet... clarity through her emails. She teased me about hitting on girls for pictures... it made me blush... wasn’t true... but it provoked... right from the start I was provoked... to act... to discover more... I sound like a fucking loser. One of those guys you see in dumb... yet somehow moving movies.. like You've Got Mail... Meg Ryan. Yikes.

She seems to not be bothered by it... nor am I... so it’s ok.

Let me tell you something.

One time I got really high... I was a lot younger then now... maybe high school... I remember taking like 2 hits of micro dot... I was on a hill, it kind of felt like the blind melon video for No Rain... I probably think that because there were flowers... and Gumby... as we called him, he had his guitar, when this guy played and sang, it was like tripping with Shannon Hoon... Shannon’s dead now... oddly enough, so is Gumby, different... hmm... so I was there that afternoon, and I drifted away into the clouds. I felt this warm feeling, like I was free... comfortable... And calm.

I’m talking about this time... cause every time I talk to Lily... That’s her name by the way... I try not to say it or write it too much because I almost hold it too close to me.

Yet... I have never seen her.

Every time I talk to her... I feel that way again.

Which bring me to my next point, I have read over the years and seen on shows like Jerry Springer where people... have fallen for people... they have never met.

Maybe fallen is too strong...

Maybe I'm not strong enough to admit it... either way.

I would make fun of these people... So you see, my issues... But, I think I can admit, that I am smitten. Curious. Yearning.

Soon... We'll see. This story kind of writes itself.
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