Tinker

Cliche All Stars

by McCutcheon
All truth passes through 3 stages...
1st it is ridiculed
2nd it is violently opposed
3rd it is accepted as being self-evident
- ARTHUR "Mr. Happy" SCHOPENHAUER

Man must live and create- live to the point of tears. -CAMUS

You don't have to do heroin to enjoy the albums of the Velvet Underground or the novels of William S. Burroughs. Many people who claim Trainspotting as their favorite film have never put a needle in their arm.

When the passions become masters, they are vices. -PASCAL

Living well and beautifully and justly are all one thing. -SOCRATES

Masturbation is the safest orgasm. And it should be sex with someone you love. Haven't you walked down the street thinking everyone around you is a wanker?

Well, you were right. Also, people who say they don't masturbate suck in bed. I don't mean they give good head, I mean they are frigid unrelaxed slabs of meat.

What makes love-making so nice is the warmth and comfort your partner gives as you are getting off. Jocelyn Elders was right when she said they should teach masturbation in school. The woman is definitely wise beyond her time. She has a seat reserved for her On The Bus.

I love, therefore I exist. -DOSTOESKY

The writer must write what he has to say, not speak it. -HEMINGWAY

Write love letters. You can't go wrong with words of affection. Even if they are via e-mail. It doesn't matter if you write like the Sloth and your poetry sucks, your efforts will be appreciated. They might even get you laid.

My eyes are useless, for they render back only the image of the known.
-HENRY MILLER

The veggie sandwich at SubWay is the cheapest, fastest, way to eat healthy when you are a starving artist. The bread might be cardboard and the veggies where fresh yesterday but the taste will inspire you to thrive at your artistic pursuits. As soon as you can afford Champagne your creative juices will run dry.

Use your health, even to the point of wearing it out. That is what it is there for. Spend all you have before you die, and do not outlive yourself.- GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

Exercise in any form is good. It doesn't matter what you do as long as you do it. Sex is not exercise, even though you can try telling your loved one it is. Just get that heart pumping and the limbs moving. Breaking a sweat keeps your body and mind fit. No one likes a fat bastard. Skinny people can be jolly.

The secret of happiness is to face the fact that the wold is horrible, horrible, horrible...you must feel it deeply and not brush it aside. -BERTRAND RUSSELL

Walk on the sunny side of the street. You can wear those sunglasses you think you look so stunning in. And it gives you a real excuse to pretend you are a pop star, actor, or model- avoiding fame in your home town of Boise, Idaho.

Words are a form of action, capable of influencing change. Their articulation represents a complete, lived experience.- INDRID BENGIS

Read the writing on the walls. Especially the graffiti in the toilets. Shit just like this. All cliches have some ring of truth. Once you have the answers, it's up to you to decide what questions you want to live by.

It takes a lot of time to be a genius, you have to sit around so much doing nothing, really doing nothing.- GERTRUDE STEIN

Drink as much water as you do beer. Drink twice as much water as you do juice. Drink water instead of soda pop.

Art is essentially the affirmation, the blessing, and the deification of existence. -NIETZSCHE

Understand it's easier to be a critic than an artist. Find your own perception of aesthetics. Don't go to museums to see the "famous" paintings. Search out the next Van Gogh at the car boot sale.

When you come right down to it all you have is yourself. The sun is a thousand rays in your belly. All the rest is nothing. -PICASSO

I celebrate myself, and sing myself. -WALT WHITMAN

Reevaluate your life sometimes. Never be too self-satisfied. Take a good look at your friends, music, bedroom. Ask if this is the best it can be.

Every great man is a unique- EMERSON

Pleasure is the object, the duty and the goal of all rational creatures. -VOLTAIRE

Make sure you know where your drugs come from. Don't take anything you are unsure of. Especially don't buy E off some sleaze in the bogs of a London club after drinking two bottles of wine. You could end up like me, drowning in a pool of your own sweat in the dark corner talking to angels. The conversation lasted a week.

And yet, if I were to design an inscription for my tombstone, I should desire none other than "That Individual." -KIERKEGAARD

Don't be influenced by the people around you. Just because everyone is an asshole with bad taste doesn't mean you have to be.

I have traveled so much because travel has enabled me to arrive at unknown places within my clouded self. -LAURENS VAN DER POST

Always leave the place you were born. You have to experience the world for yourself. Empirical knowledge is the only way to understand life. Find out for yourself that the Earth isn't flat. If you only speak one language do you even understand that one?

The meaning of life is that it stops- FRANZ KAFKA

The aim of living is life itself- GOETHE

Never read self-help books. It's a waste of money and you're smarter than that.
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